I have no idea how many of you beautiful readers are in their 20's, getting there, or past that era. Nevertheless let me tell you being in your 20's sucks and yet it is kind of cool.
I love how movies and social media have romanticized the idea of being in your 20's but me being the truthful writer that I am, let me tell you something because I can't lie. At least not to you. Being in your 20's sucks, it feels like you're a teen all over again minus having time to spare, minus some responsibilities, plus collagen to the its fullest & friends who are available anytime to do basically anything. My God, I remember when I was in my early teen years, barely leaving my childhood behind and having no clue whatsoever that that stage was ending. My dad came up to me and gave me this - unsolicited of course - pep talk about how my teen years where going to be nothing but a pain in the ass. That I was going to feel nothing but depressed, sad, no clue of what I was feeling or thinking, self-doubt, etc. He even used to judge me for wearing a hoodie on sunny days and blamed it on my youth without realizing it was just me trying to cover my body fat.
My reference frame for my IDEAL and wishful thinking teen years were based on High School Musical - me being Sharpay duh because who the hell would want to have Gabriella's personality, we only wanted to be her because of Troy -, Camp Rock, and other cool teen movies that made us late 90's early 00's kids. Even "The Parent Trap" created this ideal family picture for me and maybe for more people out there. I'm not mad at all though, I'm not blaming Disney on how life turned out for me, if anything THANK YOU FOR SETTING THE STANDARD. It was a clue of what I wanted to achieve in life.
Nevertheless, my expectations - at the time - where NOT met and my teen years - and I'm sure your's too - did not look at all like these movies had portrayed. If you reader had a different story and your teen years where actually amazing stop reading ASAP, this is not for you ... or stay and learn a different perspective on how it was for the rest of us. Personally, my teen years where full of body shame that I did to myself whilst boys started to be ... well boys, and you know being a size 0 started to matter, a small group of friends, - which is something you should have in your 20's not in your teen years - few parties, and the never ending division between the cool kids and the unpopular kids. I swear to God I have no idea how this is passed on generation over generation. However we did it, we all survived and made it out alive ... or at least most people. I mean this wholeheartedly, I'm so deeply sorry for the people that didn't. I had a few close encounters with suicide and the picture is not ... is just not pretty nor okay. Please ask for help as suicide and mental illness are not to be taken lightly.
Being in your 20's I swear it feels like teen years with a higher level of difficulty. There's is no other better way to describe it than with a Taylor Swift song, take "Fifteen" for this precise example, but now everything applies differently. If a guy has a car you feel like flying. If he says "I love you" you'll believe him because 'we're adults' now and adults don't lie, we're supposed to be mature, you're supposed to know who 'the one' is, and then again you take a deep breath and realize this is life before you know who you're going to be. Damn, Taylor just hits the jackpot over and over again. Go check out her lyrics or listen to this song ASAP.
So why is it that we get distracted from who we're supposed to be? Why do we self doubt and talk to ourselves the way my dad did with this horrible, unpleasant and definitely not motivating talk at all? Why do we cheat on ourselves and let down that 6 year old who wanted to be an astronaut, a ballerina, a singer, a dancer, a car racer, (insert your dream occupation here), etc.
I have given a lot of thought to it lately and my conclusion is this: society & expectations.
Let me say this. The only expectations that should matter are the ones we put on ourselves, and I know I sound like a broken record because you've probably heard this so many times before, but it is true. I swear I have no idea how this is passed on and on, but I'm still clueless on at what age our spark & dreams are taken away to be molded into fitting something that we're not. When did we start to negotiate with ourselves our wellbeing? When did our goals and dream life became a daily negotiation with ourselves and not motivation as big as breathing everyday? I swear to God I have no idea when I grew up this fast, but my 20's have taught me important lessons and very uncomfortable truths, so let me share them with you:
I know being in your 20's sounds like a lot of work and there's still stuff that needs to be figured out. But as I mentioned earlier, it is also kinda cool. It is cool to be a grown up kid - because being an adult is just being a kid with responsibilities that's all-. It is nice to dress however you want, it is nice to eat whatever the hell you want, it is nice to do grown up shit like smoking, drinking and so on, until you realize is not that big of a deal. One day you wakeup and realize that having your mom do your laundry, meals, and even your homework sometimes, was not bad. Not bad at all. My god I wish I could be a kid, I still am, but you know minus the responsibilities. Call me lazy if you want, I'm not but this is my wishful thinking doing the talking.
Enjoy your 20's they will suck sometimes but some others they will be nice. Very nice.
THANK YOU FOR READING